The title, and the article itself, is pretty funny:
Attack of the Resolutionaries
January is a nightmare of congestion at the gym, as new members and no-show members alike descend upon them to fulfill their resolutions. Generally, it tapers off by February.
The humor is a bit cruel, really. I'd love more "resolutionaries" to come and stay, learn how to keep themselves in shape, make exercising a part of their lives . . . but it rarely happens, and the flood of temporary trainees is painful when you try to park or work out yourself. Here's hoping a few more stay, learn the ropes, and achieve their goals.